Man in court after accusing geese and duck of 'assault'

7 June 2025, 14:28 | Updated: 7 June 2025, 14:37

A man has appeared in court after accusing three geese and a duck of “assault.”

David William Kerr, 43, had reportedly been released on bail after being charged with improper use of a communication network when he contacted police regarding the alleged animal attack.

According to a police officer familiar with the case, Mr Kerr was arrested just days after being released for breaching his bail conditions by contacting police via the 101 number when not in a genuine emergency.

The officer told Dungannon Magistrates’ Court: “On the afternoon of May 29, an officer received a voicemail from the defendant stating he had been attacked and needed to know whether he should ring 101 or 999.

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“It transpired he had been attacked by livestock and had hurt his leg, which he wanted police to deal with.”

Kerr was informed that his current plight was not an emergency, or even a crime, as “animals can’t assault anyone”, the Impartial Reporter writes.

Despite this, he called police minutes later to tell officers he had been “assaulted and attacked by livestock.”

While attending another incident, the officer said she heard a radio transmission suggesting Kerr had contacted 99 to report he had been “attacked by three geese and a duck.”

She added: “This was not, in fact, the case.”

Speaking to the defence, District Judge Francis Rafferty asked: “Was the defendant suggesting this was a joint enterprise matter involving the duck acting in concert with the geese? Were the same geese and duck responsible for the earlier assault, or was that a different farmyard animal?”

The defence barrister replied: “It was the same situation. No other livestock were involved.”

The defence went on to explain Kerr had been bitten by the geese while trying to remove them from the road during his drive home. The defence added: “To his credit, he was aware of his bail conditions. He contacted the officer who had interviewed and charged him earlier in the week to seek clarification.

“He was simply trying to get home and the geese and duck were obstructing the road.”

“Did he not beep his horn or flash his lights at them?” the judge asked.

Speaking up, Kerr told the court: “I wasn’t driving. It was my friend. He was going to run over them, and I told him, no.”

“And for your kindness you were attacked by them?” the judge questioned.

“I didn’t want to kill poor animals. I just thought if I got out and chased them from the road, they would have run.”

The judge decided to readmit Kerr’s bail while reminding him of the conditions.

“The police are under enough pressure as it is, with a lack of resources and actual crimes. The last thing they need – whether you are attacked by a duck, a goose, or even an emu – is to be contacted unnecessarily. You must only contact PSNI in the event of a genuine emergency,” Judge Rafferty concluded.

The case is listed for further mention at Enniskillen Magistrates’ Court on 16 June.